I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
