It's like God shit irony all over that family
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
