I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.