she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
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