she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
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