Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
