No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
