I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
So vagazzling was a success
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
