Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
