You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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