I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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