evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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