There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
