so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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