don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
