yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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