and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
