butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Randomize
