A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
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