She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize