we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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