then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
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Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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