Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
