and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Randomize
