I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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