He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
