My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
