Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
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