What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
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