is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
