areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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