hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
