We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
