At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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