I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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