she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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