When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
