brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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