Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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