So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Welp...herpes.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
