So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize
