so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
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I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
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