Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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