I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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