i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
