The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
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I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
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You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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