She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
