i jhust puked up my retainher.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
