Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
