Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
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