How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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