The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize